when we were putting judah down for his nap today, he all of a sudden said his ear was hurting.
my immediate thought was that he has reached the age of faking things. sad but inevitable. i, myself, was a huge fan of the zack morris hold-the-thermometer-up-to-a-lightbulb-to-get-it-hot-enought-to-pass-for-a-fever-and-then-show-it-to-mom trick to get out of school.
he also has had maybe 1.5 ear infections in his life, so i was further dubious.
but the boy is usually a great sleeper and doesnt fight naps, so when he kept saying, "mai ear just kinda rully hurt, mommy," i decided to believe him.
due to my fakery, my parents didnt believe me in 3rd grade when i jumped out of a very high swing after school on hallowwen and caught myself on all fours, injuring my wrist. i insisted it was broken, but they sent me out trick or treating nonetheless, during which i avoided my usual candy-hoarding because carrying my basket was so painful.
the next day at school we played flag football, and in my quest for PE dominance i was driving for the endzone when my classmate tried to grab my flag but grabbed my shorts instead, taking me down...on my hurt wrist.
finally they took me to the ER and i it was broken. boy i got some good guilt presents out of that one.
and since i dont want to have to buy judah 18 "sorry i didnt believe you and you were in horrible pain" monster trucks, i took him to urgent care just now.
i gleefully told this story to a little girl who was also waiting with a possibly-broken arm from a soccer game and told her she was lucky her parents didnt force her out on to the mean streets with an injured paw. i refrained from telling her that they make it stop hurting by giving you a shot.
so judah was bee-bopping around in the waiting room and i was getting feisty at him that maybe it was just a nap-avoidance sham that was going to cost me $50. but alas, the doctor came in and certified one ear "definitely infected."
i was actually happy. now, i HATE my kid being in pain, but i LOVE a sure diagnosis (how i loathe the, "it's just viral, tylenol and lots of liquids and your $30 copay plus those hellish 1.5 hrs waiting for the doctor of your life that you'll never get back, please" line) and putting off the faking stage a little longer.
as we left, he asked to run down the wheelchair ramp instead of the stairs and of course due to the fluid buildup on his inner ear and his sleepy state, his balance was all off and he bit the dust, scraping his hands and knees up real nice.
we went to publix to get his antibiotic and he was in rarest of forms in the car on the way there. sleepiness+ear infection+newly inflicted scrape/fall trauma+monsters inc skipping on the DVD= meltdownicus maximus.
when we got to publix he was so weepy in the cart that i despaired of our wait time. i took him out and let him lay on me on the bench while we waited. he was extra cuddly and asked me to sing him a song.
now, if musical talent was rated from a 1 being rebecca black to a 10 being that fuzzy brittish chick who won simon cowell over, then i score some glyph that looks like a dead guppy or something.
but when my sick little boy who resisted loving me for so long is wrapped around me in pain and asks for a song, you'd better believe i WAS natalie maines as i sang him our song over and over for the whole Rx line to hear.
when it was time to pay i asked the pharmacist to tell me if he was asleep, since i couldnt see his face from where he was on me. she said he was and so sweetly swiped my card for me, signed for me and did all my checkout-ery work so i wouldnt have to jostle him too much (publix, where shopping IS a pleasure).
this is maybe the 3rd time since his 1st birthday that he has fallen asleep out in public. it almost never happens and i love it oh so much.
and again, i HATE that he is in pain, but my sweet boy, the one whose existence made me a mama, being wrapped around me and at home enough to just let go and be fully at rest on me is seriously a PERFECT mothers day gift.
the hokey pokey? bump that. this is what it's all about.
and because i am wondering if my obscure references ever make sense to anyone, $10 shop credit in my etsy store to the first person who can tell me why i titled this post what i did.