in which i think i'm clever

i have a total of 2 internet tricks that i can turn. when i tell friends about these, they want the lowdown. they are mad useful and so in the interest of disseminating as much useful brain pollen as possible, i'm sharing them with you today.

1. after my obsession began with Downton Abbey i obviously watched both seasons in about 3 days. then it was over and my life stopped having meaning. what was i supposed to do without my regular fix of brittish wit, 20's fashion, hideously curled bangs, and 7th grade giggles about "Mister Bates?"  

i was incensed to find that the brits across the pond had already watched all of season 3 and here yankee doodle me was stuck waiting until january. i say A POX on that!   dont tread on me! so i had myself a little interwebby tea party, overthrew my royalist oppressors and got the hookup. i have already watched all of season 3.  

no syndication without representation, bitches.

i am not sure if this site is 100% legit, so i only watch things on it that are free when they are originally broadcast. it's my personal code of pirating ethics. (read all about it in my forthcoming deposition) since Downton is on PBS, that's totally free like, pick-it-up-on-rabbit-ears-on-my-9-inch-black-and-white-TV free (on both sides of the pond), so i feel good about it.

you do have to wade through some sketchy pop ups and do a little trial and error, but like i said, i watched every episode from season 3 this way. 

2. my second little trickeration of the internet might make me look a little nutlog. i'm at peace. 

ok so jesse and i both have iphones. we keep them almost exclusively on silent. this means that they are easy to misplace AND it is easy to miss a call or text. additionally, one of us if often out of the house working and the other is at home with the kids slowing losing their mind because, candyland and chutes and ladders are designed to slowly vaporize brain cells. when it's me, i am counting the minutes until he is home and i'd rather not endanger his life by constantly texting, "where are you?" everying 90 seconds.

solution: the Find My iphone app.

here's the obvious perks: it's free. you can locate your phone from any computer or other phone. it will show you on a map where your phone is if you have utterly lost it (and give you driving directions). if its just misplaced in your house, even if its on silent, you can force it to play a sound (it sounds like a submarine sonar) that keeps going until someone picks it up.

yeah i zoomed out so you jokers wont know exactly where my bat cave is.

and say you locate your lost phone and you see that RUH-ROH your phone is in the lair of your worst frenemy. and maybe you had some boobie pics on there that you sent your husband? well in case of emergency, you can lock your phone remotely or even completely wipe its memory with this handy little app.

but my favorite part (and the slightly tricky part) of this app is that, since all of the devices in our house  are under the same iCloud account, i can not only find my own phone when it's missing, but i can also find out where jesse's phone (and therefore, he) is without bothering him. 

i know this is a little like putting a tracking device on someone, but there's never a time when he wouldnt be okay with me knowing where he is or visa versa (except this one time he turned off his phone so i wouldnt know he was coming home early from a trip to surprise me..full clemency!).

this also works if there is an emergency and our phones are on silent. this usually happens when i am taking a nap and jesse really needs to get ahold of me. he can force my phone to play a sound (even on silent). also if one of us is just not feeling the phone vibrate in our pocket or is maybe ignoring the vibes because we're at a meeting, the other person canforce the phone to beep so they know they are needed. i have to use some self control on this one and must never, EVER use this feature one sunday mornings when jesse is leading worship.

i know there are other tracking-ish and lost phone apps, but this one is by far the best one we've tried and we seriously use it at least 5 times a week.

so there you go. maybe this is the biggest "DUH" of ever, but on the off chance you didnt know where to find Lady Mary Crawley or your husband...this post might be useful!


  1. sister-in-m'lord1/3/13, 12:47 PM

    I still can't help but wonder if this entire show isn't building up to getting Bates some kind of position where the entire staff must address him as "Master." If so, well played, England.

    1. i have had that exact same conspiracy theory, like, verbatim! we're so related.

    2. Sister-in-low1/11/13, 3:09 AM

      I kind of hope so, because WWI-era euphemisms for self-pleasure are hilarious, yo. Perhaps Bates could become Head Chicken Choker. Or gets busted down to footman and becomes the official Gravy Slinger. Hurr hurr.

  2. My husband and I totally do the same thing with the find my iphone app...it was useful (it plays the noise on the external speaker even when there are headphones or water in the jack) when I thought I broke my phone when it took a bath in the sink :(

  3. Thank sweet baby Jesus for you, mama Dukes. I just discovered maybe a half hour ago that I NO LONGER GET PBS. NJ had a public tv shake up a while back(because we're cool like that) that I had forgotten about, and I've been having a meltdown the size of Ms. O'Brien's bangs pouf. Once again, you have SAVED THE DAY. Thanks broseph.

  4. Hey there!
    Found your blog through Pinterest about 6 months ago and I have read every entry! Love it! So this is kind of a 'long-time salker, first-time commenter' sort of thing. Haha! Anywho, I am NOT clever with the internetty stuff and I just tried to watch an episode using the link. Did you just download the first one on each list, or did you stick with a certain provider even if they had lower success scores? I'm asking because I tried to do it and it uploaded a crapload of stuff onto my computer and then said I had to sign up for Media Toolbox. Does this sound right? I am so sorry to bother you, but I just watched episode 2 on TV and I am DYING for more! :-) Thanks for any help you can give me.