our hero

today (for some reason this posted at 9:46 pm on 6/20...but really it was just after midnight on 6/21, fathers day, i think my time zone is messed up) is our first ever father's day. i was this close to reciprocating jesse's mother's day gesture of recording myself singing him a song. hmmmm, not so much. besides skin tone, one of the top tangible traits i hoped judah would inherit exclusively from jesse is musical talent.

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jesse is in south carolina today on a youth group trip, so he wont get to see me or his son on his first father's day...or so he thinks. we are driving up there to surprise him at noon. i am staying with my parents this weekend and their house is only 100 miles from the camp, so i am hoping to make it a manageable mini-roadtrip for me and the judah-bug.

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it has been 27 days since judah came storming into the world and made me and jesse a mommy and a daddy. 967 days before that we made each other a wife and a husband. it was about 3 days into our marriage that i realized the kind of dad god destined jesse to be the day he created him. i dont mean he knows how to interpret cries, change diapers, or swaddle any better than anyone else, but jesse is a natural father in all the ways that really count.

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i have considered several times since judah was born how glad i am that the bible never refers to god as "god the mother." i can't imagine the pressure of sharing a name/title with the creator of the universe. of being the primary example our children will refer back to every time they hear god called "the father." jesse and i are both blessed with amazing earthly fathers, so amazing that hearing our god called "father" has made it easier to love, admire, and follow him, but i have known many people who have a very hard time trusting/loving/believing in god the father because of negative associations they have with their biological dads. what pressure...what a name to live up to.

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that said, i have 100% confidence that i married the man who is the best possible example for our children of a father's love. an example that will constantly point back to the grace, mercy, passion, and above all, love, that our father in heaven lavishes upon us. i dont expect jesse to never mess up, but i know that judah, and any subsequent kids we have, will have vivid examples of unfailing fatherly love to draw upon from their daily encounters with their dad.

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its really cool that god is known as a father to us his children, and jesus is known as a bridegroom to us his bride. the bible didnt make up brand new relationships to convey the love of the lord for us, but instead counted on our earthly relationships to be the best examples. i am awed by the love jesus has for me partly because i know that it is similar and even beyond the incredible love my human husband shows me. i am so freaking lucky to have a tangible example of a bridegroom that almost always points me directly back to the perfect love of christ. in the same way, judah is already receiving this awesome gift in the form of a temporary earthly father who will constantly point him back to the father who knows his every thought, his every dream, his every hair, and who has loved him outside the bounds of time.

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happy father's day, jesse. we love you!