Halloween 2016: Put Up Your Dunes

I have been SITTING on this drop-dead-slay-worthy piece of comedy for OVER TEN MONTHS. It took everything I had in January not to run immediately to the computer and share it.

I knew, I JUST KNEW, if I could wait until after Halloween, it would be so so worth the wait to reveal it all together.

What follows is the funniest recording I've ever spontaneously caught, combined with our yearly DIY family Halloween costume, sprinkled with every self-esteem issue I've ever had, rolled up with what it often feels like to be a mom.

Before anything, you must--MUST watch this short clip that explains where it all began. I beg of you not to skip ahead...it's so worth it. --Also because I spent an embarrassing amount of time making the video on my phone to go along with the audio and it's delightfully ghetto:

It came RIGHT to her, and Judah immediately agreed: no one had any issues with this match up!

And with that, the Dukes Family proudly presents our 2016 Halloween Offering: 

Aladdin Fam:

Starring: Jesse as Jafar; Noa as Abu; Layla as Jasmine; Judah as Aladdin; Keight as that buxom obese creepy lady who is on screen for 2 seconds objectifying the protagonist.

Could we have gone the Genie/Sultan/Carpet route? YES! In fact, Jesse was only chosen as Jafar out of all of these options only because I found a black robe at the thrift store before any of those other characters' prop (and it turned out great because I'd actually forgotten what the kids had originally assigned him in the recording). And it would have been way more iconic and recognizable for me to do one of them instead of "the rather tasty lady", but I simply could NOT give up this chance that the kids had scripted for me.

It crazy to me how well they nailed a theme too. They just did so well picking out costumes that fit each kid and what character they would like and would be cute on them. PLUS something cool for daddy and then something leftover and horribly embarrassing for mommy. JUST LIKE EVERY YEAR.

I was kind of feeling like a slacker for doing a Disney princess theme (including her non DIY outfit) but now I think this may be my favorite year ever because it's so bananas and just so us.

Street Rat surprisingly LOVED his costume. He's usually the least game of all of us.

Lounging with Raja on her terrace dreaming of a life of freedom (crying eyes because her ear piercing had closed up a teeny bit and I poked the earring through). 

Sticking together on the mean streets of Agrabah.  Noa also put up ZERO fight about the face-encompassing costume. and ADORED everything about Halloween (saying "TICKOTEE" and "gank goo" repeatedly being her favorite activities). 

This was extremely fun. He has on SO much eyeliner. We ran out of time or we would've added the twirly beard and snake staff.  I still think he pulls it off, and then some.

Go ahead and pencil this one in for "Senior Yearbook ad" and "rehearsal dinner"

AKA:

I can show you my fist

Punch you over and over

let me tell you princess, if this gets out at school 

I'll make you paaaaaay!

A whole new world!

Urchin Squad

Things are unravelling fast now, Boy!

Sending your flea-ridden pet to do your dirty work!?

 Your sorcery will never win her, Jafar! She doesn't love you!

The greatest love story never told. Cant wait to spend 10,000 years crammed  into a lamp with this guy.

Until next year, tasty ones!

Past Halloween FamJams:

2009: Sushi Fam

2010 : Volley Fam

2011: Curious George fam

2012: Wall-E Ween

2013: Dora Fam

2014: The Walking Dukes

2015: Guardi-uke of the Galaxy

a few pre-kids group hits ("Clue" and britney/k-fed)

Halloween 2015: Guardi-ukes of the Galaxy

More of our Halloween nonsense:

2009: Sushi Fam

2010 : Volley Fam

2011: Curious George fam

2012: Wall-E Ween

2013: Dora Fam

2014: The Walking Dukes

a few pre-kids group hits ("Clue" and britney/k-fed)

Another October, another insane, homemade family costume for us.

I saw Guardians of the Galaxy months after it came out. I am not a huge fan of the recent Marvel movies (they take themselves too seriously), so despite my love (LOVE-AH) for Chris Pratt in Parks and Rec, I wasn't too interested when this came out.

But I kept hearing great things about it as more of a comedy/rock opera than your typical superhero fare. That, plus a few articles on Chris' new abs sold me. 

I paid $6 to watch it on the plane out to Utah when Noa and I went in December during maternity leave. I paid $6 again to watch it on the return flight too. And then I paid to rent it from RedBox and make my family watch it when I got home. Then I paid to buy it AND its soundtrack. 

It's hilarious and the music rules. Watch it now.

It took maybe 45 minutes watching it before I realized that this could be our group costume--assuming Judah and Layla liked the movie, which they very much did (note: this is PG-13, but most of what makes it so goes over the head of a 4 & 6 year old. I think it might not be appropriate for a 8/9 year old who could catch more of the sexy innuendo jokes or cuss words, but mine are young enough to be clueless).

This year Jesse and I made the BRILLIANT decision to not stay dressed up ourselves when we left the house--drastically decreasing the discomfort and embarrassment factor. This was huge because we went real trick-or-treating in our new neighborhood this year instead of to a contained Fall Festival. I cannot have our neighbors having this as their first impression of us. 

Also, by the time I finish all the last minute DIY's, I am in full Stress-Dragon mode, and don't really want kids coming up to me talking to me like I am whatever character I'm dressed up as that year. GROOT WILL DESTROY YOU.

It was fabulous to be able to just wear jeans and have my penchant for dressing up as a tree in my backyard be my little secret.

Halloween 2k15. Boo-ya

Judah as Peter Quill/Starlord

My favorite part of Judah's was the addition of the orange headphones. Judah's favorite song of all time since watching this is "Come and Get Your Love," so he needed the headphones.

Flying, duh.

Not about it.

Inspiration

The coat (which appears as both a signature trench and a short version in the movie) is made from a ladies' velvet blazer from Goodwill with some leather scraps sewn on. Judah was not pleased at first when I pulled this out of the bag, but the sewing skills made it something he loved so much that he currently sleeps in bed with. Like a blankie. Spectacular weirdo.

The orb. You'll never possess it, Ronan! (Possessing Chris wouldnt be so bad...)

Layla as Gamora. 

Layla plays a raven-haired, sword wielding badass chick for the second year in a row! Green facepaint, a green rashguard from Goodwill turned her into the green-hued beauty you see before you. I cut down a cargo shirt to make the vest and added some duct tape gemstones. Also, toned down the cleave.

Layla was ALL ABOUT getting into character and recreating scenes.

She was even okay recreating the almost-smoochy scence that turns into a butt-kicking and one of the funniest lines of the movie: PELVIC SORCERY! (sorry that image is cruddy)

Noa Lou as Rocket Raccoon. 

Noa was the perfect size to play rocket! I found a used baby raccoon costume on eBay for way cheap over the summer and just added a yellow shirt and duct tape. Noa was pretty steady on the "bewildered" side of things in terms of her reaction to this family production. So she didn't really channel the character like I would have hoped. I'm disappointed by her acting skills.

Speaking of skills, check out Jesse as Drax the Destroyer!

Silver facepaint and swimcap, plus some tattoo stickers and a homemade shirt with implants...of muscles.

aaaaaand as per usual, I get whatever costume and character is left over. This time it was Groot. I AM GROOT.

Groot was surprisingly easy and cheap to make. Twisted craft paper and cardboard over earth tone clothes. I should have added more roots. I'm thinking the whole Mommy-as-Groot thing, is what interfered with Noa's concentration that day.

Yeah. She was...perplexed. If not downright terrified. Even though I was extra friendly version of Groot.

Sometimes terrified.

Weird how Jesse's natural abs are riding up.

 FIIIIIGHT (this one Judah was all about recreating)

 They are the winners of the family acting prizes.

smiling to ensure her safety with the camera person in exchange for escape from the flora that ate mommy.

The thrill of this conquest lasted maybe an hour. Around bedtime that night I was already, "oh my gosh Jesse, what are we going to do next year?!? We'll never think of anything!" And then I put those thoughts away until the very last minute next year.

This is now our most consistent, well-documented family tradition. I don't even know what to think about that.

More of our Halloween nonsense:

2009: Sushi Fam

2010 : Volley Fam

2011: Curious George fam

2012: Wall-E Ween

2013: Dora Fam

2014: The Walking Dukes

a few pre-kids group hits ("Clue" and britney/k-fed)

Halloween 2014: The Walking Dukes

Did you think we might take a year off from our family Halloween costume tradition since we had a 3 week old? Well, all you doubting tricks are about to get treated (I am among you...never thought we'd pull one off this time).

Jesse actually gets all the credit for this one. Before Noa was born he was thinking about a theme that would work whether or not Noa and I felt up to joining in. AND one where Noa could be in her carseat or worn the entire time.

You may or may not already know that we live in a little town called Senoia. We are home to a famous fancy furniture store, the house at the beginning of Fried Green Tomatoes, and as of the past few years, we are also where The Walking Dead is filmed.

I've never been a zombie girl (in terms of liking them...and being one). I'm all about Harry Potter, Star Wars, Game of Thrones and those facets of dork-dom, but zombies just always bored me--or at best grossed me out.

So when the buzz was getting out about the new zombie show on AMC that was filmed in Atlanta, i thought that was pretty cool that our city was the setting, but I would pass just because of yuck.

Well, when filming began in season 3 and was a half mile from our front door, that pulled Jesse in. He was hooked. And oh how I judged. It was like how he told me our entire dating lives that he hated tomatoes (like all good people should) and then a few months into marriage he starts saying, "they're not that bad." VIPER IN MY BOSOM!!!! You like tomatoes and zombies now? Okay, well, you're a disgusting traitor...enjoy your lycopene and nightmares.

But not wanting to spend precious, kidless  nighttime hours apart, when he would be watching episodes of the show, I would sit out on the couch and tool around on my laptop (because occupying the same space counts as working on our marrige, right?).  I would be all, "this is disgusting, you know that? I cant even look at the screen. It's just over the top and gratuitous and I am just so much more highbrow than you. I read Jane Austen now, ya know?"

But as the weeks went by I found myself averting my eyes less quickly. The turning point was one night I caught myself going, "Okay, wait a second, why is that guy mad at her? Isn't she on their side?" When I heard myself it was like I had blurted out some nasty word. NOOOOO! I take it back--REDACTED!

But alas, I was hooked.

I went back and tried the first few episodes on Netflix and was instantly a huge fan/addict. I binge watched to catch up. Oh, I still hate the zombies and the gore is ultra sloppy-doo and over the top, but the show isn't a zombie show; it's a human show. It really is incredibly thought provoking, and the actors are very-well cast and talented.

For fans of the show: we live a stones throw from mainstreet "Woodbury."

So when Jesse needed a theme that included a baby, Walking Dead was fresh in his mind...AND super on-point for our little zombie-crazed town. Jesse looks a lot like Rick anyway, Noa was obviously going to play baby Judith in her "carried around in her carrier all the time" phase, I was the one blonde chick who you could take or leave (in case I flaked out due to postpartum angst). Judah and Layla got to be the two characters with the most kid appeal: a dreadlocked sword wielding badass warrior woman for Layla, and a fan-favorite crossbow-toting redneck hottie bad boy for Judah.

Here's how it unfolded.

Layla Dukes as Michonne.

I can't recommend messing with her.

or her.

Judah Dukes as Daryl

In the words of most fangirls: YUM

He was upset when I first told him what to wear. He said "It looks too snappy!" So we quickly de-snappied it AND made it more true to the character by going outside and smearing dirt all over everything and then using makeup to make his face dirty and spray in hair color leftover from Diego to darken his locks.

Power duo.

DON'T FRONT. THEY WILL WASTE YOU!

 Walkers beware.

For whatever reason I was never totally a Daryl girl. I found myself drawn to Rick--for reasons I didnt totally understand.

Until Halloween:

Yup, there it is. Mystery solved.

And that just leaves no one's favorite character: Andrea!

I couldn't get my hands as veiny....but I did crawl around our front yard with a plastic knife at 3 weeks postpartum to really get into character.

We even DIY'ed Daryl's signature vest design!

 Patrol duty.

Our town has fully embraced our little slice of specific notoriety. We have many Walking Dead themed events, restaurant specials, and there is even an official Walking Dead Store, which of course we had to visit that evening.

I'll take the one on the left. *NOTE: that is not a real gun. But boy oh boy, the security guard at the church Trunk-or-Treat we attended wasnt aware of that and converged on Jesse like whoa until it was clarified.

Per his request, I gave him a lil' redneck mustache.

Weirdly my most naturally aggressive (her kisses leave bruises) and fierce child CANNOT fake being intense/angry.

 Dream Team

 Even dreamier team.

Official Portrait. We give you, The Walking Dukes.

Off to save the world, and make all the ladies swoon in the process!

*P.S. NOOOOOO My kids have never seen even a nanosecond of this show! We shoed them their inspiration character photos and they know about the TV show of "yucky zombies for grownups only and even then it's still gross" that films all around us, but OBVIOUSLY they are never seen it!*

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More halloween group costume insanity:

year 1: Sushi Fam

year 2 : Volley Fam

year 3: Curious George fam

year 4: Wall-E fam

year 5: Dora Fam

a few pre-kids group hits (clue and britney/k-fed)