wherein my husband has children with another woman...for jesus

yall might be familiar with John Waller, the christian singer. 

a few months ago, one of our great friends, Dawn, who is a passionate advocate of adoption, and is also friends with John and was crucial in the production of the video, asked if Jesse and Layla could be a part of a project he was doing for his upcoming music video for his beautiful song about adoption and the heart of christ.

she said it was going to involve many real life families who have adopted (including hers...she and her hubby, Don--yes Don and Dawn--have 3 awesome adopted chilluns). i didnt think much of it. Jesse and Layla were gone the whole day and he told me about some of it when he got back, but i guess i thought he was probably making a bigger deal of his one little part in the video, especially since we havent adopted and children (so far) and i figured he was just a filler guy or something for the real stars.

and then a few days later he showed me the final cut (which just went public yesterday). ummm, so yeah they are sort of slightly prominent in the video just kind of. SERIOUSLY WATCH THIS:

you may recognize Jesse's flipping adorable "son" as Judah's real life BFF, Marc, who is Dawn's youngest son and who i just love to pieces because he is a beam of sunshine (and whose bday party this hilariousness occurred at).

okay so if it wasnt strange enough to see Jesse playing the loving husband to a (GORGEOUS!) woman i dont know, there he is being the dad of Judah's real life best buddy. and then just for funsies to blow my mind even harder, we throw in Layla as the adopted daughter in this fictional family.

i felt a little bit like i was having an out of body experience watching half of my family get swapped out!

Dawn told us that they had wanted a little girl who didnt physically resemble her "parents" in the the video so that it would be understood that the little girl with glasses who was adopted at the beginning of the video (who grows up to be Jesse's "wife" with glasses) had, in her married adulthood, adopted Marc and then also adopted a little girl as well.

despite being genetically 50% the same, the combo of Jesse and Layla fit the bill of "looking unrelated by blood." it also was perfect since they wanted the little girl to really run into the daddy's arms and getting a three year old to do this with a stranger would have been tough.

after i got over the initial bizzaro feeling that accompanies watching your spouse play house with someone else (how to spouses of actors do it?!?!),  i fell in love with the entire video. we have many close friends you have adopted (creightons, dockerys) or are adopting so this video and song are just such a beautiful picture for us of how we are ALL adopted by jesus and how much is heart is for earthly orphans as well.

the part with all the families toward the end are all real life adoptive families and that gets me every time. just tears for the heartbreak and the beauty and the jesus magic that is adoption.

a little director's cut bonus footage fact: Jesse told me the day of filming had been long and taken a toll on miss Layla's already miniscule attention span. so Dawn all day had promised Layla candy at the end if she behaved. so at that emotional climax of the video when Layla collapses into Jesse's arms and i am tearing up, i always start to laugh because Jesse divulged that in this loving embrace, my little mercenary is whispering into her daddy's ear, "you hab sweet tahts?" the piper must be paid.

after seeing the impact of the entire project, we feel so honored to have been even a teensy part of this beautiful song and the reminder of jesus' heart for all of us as his adopted children. rock on.

following up: ukreightons, lalabu and waffle

it's a charming habit of mine to write posts that require me to keep you updated or to come back and finish the story later...and then to forget to do that. (are you so charmed?) so today, i try to to tie up the loose ends using all of my rope skills (they are legion). these are actually all things that i asked for (and sooooo got) y'alls help on, so i crazy owe you anyway.

1. the UKREIGHTONS! yall, god went buck wild (as he is wont to do) and raised the money needed for travel and all three adoptions with a quickness! the benefit concert was HUGE and we sold out of t-shirts lickety split.

 the stateside portion of the family rocking their adoption shirts before the concert

greg and ann just got back from their first trip to ukraine. they have a court date and will return there on august 5th and then a week or two later they will go back again (3rd time in a month...you see why this was expensive) to GET THEIR KIDS AND BRING THEM HOME!!!

greg, sofia, natasha, ura and ann

2. LALABU they did it too! our friend (the inventor/designers) raised over $18,000 on indiegogo to fund the first wave of production on their urm-azing new baby carriers. i know lots of yall contributed and got in on some perks (i'm in for 2 carriers...because i expect twins?!?!) and i'm so excited that the first carriers are shipping next month. find out more and order yours today.

how she managed to reproduce the exact same pose again and again is beyond me.

3. WAFFLE! i still kind of cant believe we crowd-funded a freaking kitten. internet, you has weird. now i did post some updates on the waffly-boy that same night, but wanted to give an update on his medical condition here almost two weeks later. thanks to all of yall who chipped in we were able to take him to a real, normal vet and get him worked on. his side wound is healing so well and we go back for a follow-up on it friday. if all looks good and his fever is gone (from the infection) then we can get him snipped and vaccinated. this is so exciting because then he can come inside and live and play. did you know that boy cats whose change purses have NOT been emptied have a charming propensity to SPRAY urine all over everything to mark their territory (i am NOT charmed, nature). so yeah. he's been doing his thing out of doors and treasuring his last days with his jelly beans. 

 snoozing on a broom handle (his bed is nearby...he's just adorably weird.)  i love this tiny guy.

 he is so loving and clingy and affectionate. he follows all member of the family around whenever we got outside. here's a nice shot of the neuter-fodder.

in fact, he's so friendly that he decided to go INTO our dogs fence and introduce himself. we were gardening this weekend and jesse turned around to see waffle in the jaws of our first-born adopted pet, chopper, the huge shephard/chow/lab mutt. it was horrifying. jesse sprinted into the pen while i ever-so-helpfully stood by and screamed. my first thought: "NOOOOO I LOVE THAT CAT!" my second thought, "OMG holy crap, all my friends paid to keep this cat alive and we've almost immediately fed him to our dogs. how embarrassing!"

so waffle is either friendly, stupid or suicidal. lesson learned by us all. thankfully he wasnt hurt at all, chopper had just pinned him down on the ground and most of the scary noises were from him and clifford fighting each other, not eating our newest pet. waffle was completely over it and unphased by the whole ordeal, calmly purring away seconds later while jesse and i came down for our adrenaline hurricanes. 

hell of a thing, that food chain.

layla, disturbingly, kissing waffle's butt.

so there you have it. 3 causes yall championed and rocked. THANK YOU! 

is there any other post that i was supposed to give you a follow up on that i have already forgotten? (besides my failed countdown that never got past #10 and #9 and will likely never be completed).

story time

do you like surprise endings? well, read on, because this story has a good one.

this is a true story. 

its the 80's: boy meets girl. they both love jesus. they are cute (well, 80's cute) and charming and they fall in love.

who ate sushi in the 80's!?!?! only the coolest of cats, yall (look at all the differnt button styles on that ONE shirt!)

they get married.

a tiny-waisted stevie nicks lookalike and her bearded groom!

two years after graduating college they have their first child--a boy-- in 1987. a little girl comes along two years later followed by a surprise baby boy 18 months after that.

necklaces are worn outside of turtlenecks and there are un-ironic mustaches. it was a different time.

a four year old rocking the turtleneck/blazer combo. swagger.

in the next 22 years this family raises these 3 kids. they model a christ-centered marriage and a kingdom life. they serve, they go, they give, they do, they serve some more, THEY LOVE. 

and then the kids all turn blonde spontaneously.

the family has their struggles but they all come out on the other side loving jesus and each other more.

yikes. awkward tween years are a perfect example of what this family has overcome (no worries- they all end up quite handsome)

told ya.

the oldest son graduates from college, marries a perfect ballerina and they have a little girl, the first grandchild, 2 years later.

this little branched-off family loves jesus madly.

i mean...

um, hi, are you kidding me? grandparents are NOT allowed to look like this.

the middle child, the girl, grows into a beautiful, magnetic, passionate young woman. she graduates college and decides to become children's minister. she meets the boy of her dreams. he is handsome and funny (and mind-bogglingly good at Ruzzle, dangit) and he loves jesus. they get married.

more proof that awkward teens make GORGEOUS adults.

at this couple's wedding, their parents get a spontaneous STANDING OVATION upon leaving the ceremony from all of the wedding guests because it is so clear the model they have laid down for this couple and how deeply rooted the new bride and groom are in christ already. (has that ever happened before in the history of the world!?!? )

this january, the surprise baby boy that our couple had back in 1991 turns 22. he is graduating from college and becoming a teacher. oh yeah, he loves jesus too.

still looking for that special lady...any takers? (hahaha sorry nick, this was the most representative picture)

these parents have raised their flock to adulthood. 

they have stewarded the hearts of the children that jesus entrusted to them and they have done a beautiful job. 

their kids' faiths have strong, independent legs that will stand wherever they go.  this family is rock solid and is one that we can all look up to and learn from.

on their recent 28th wedding anniversary.  and they lived happily ever after. their hard work of parenting is over...right?

by almost any standards of "good parenting", our couple should get a "great work! you did it. now go enjoy YOUR time!"

the end...

roll credits

except--bonus footage TWIST!--this couple gave their entire lives to jesus a long time ago, not just their 20's, 30's and 40's. so as long as they are living they are listening for his voice and following him. 

turns out when you follow jesus, he leads you straight to his children.

right around new years, this couple began to understand the next chapter jesus was leading them towards and they obeyed.

are you ready for this?

jesus told them that they had 3 more kids. 3 teenage kids currently living in an orphanage in the Ukraine.

these three kids:

sophia, natasha and ura

they are now deep into the process of adopting all three kids and becoming their forever parents.

do you get that? at 50, with 3 amazing adult children freshly raised, they are expecting again! 3 kids! teenagers! who dont speak any english!!

you may be tempted (by the minions of lord voldemort himself) to think, "so what? they already did 3 kids, what's 3 more?"

to you, dear lunatic, i say *face slap* because you are clearly a hysterical drunk who doesnt realize how hard parenting even ONE child is, and the relief that comes with getting each child to a new level of independence and the sheer terror of going BACK and giving up a single fingernail of freedom that you have fought for (do you sense my personal feelings coming through?).

these two people, ann and greg creighton, are mentors to me and jesse. they are ministers, caretakers and idols to our kids. they are our close friends and they are our brother and sister in christ.

yall, they are my heroes (despite their unfortunate collegiate affiliations).

so here's where we get to be a part of this story. 

as probably everyone knows, any adoption (or parenting venture!) is expensive and scary. it can be overwhelming and filled with pitfalls and brokenness.

now multiply that by three.

as their friends and as fellow members of the creighton's chuch (church with a little c, as in the building we meet in) we are standing behind them and this path jesus has called them to. we are saying "you are not alone" and promising to walk the road with them.

but we the Church (capital C...as in the body of christ) can help on a way bigger scale. because jesus was pretty clear about taking care of orphans, and this is a beautiful way to be his hands and feet rightnowtoday (even if youre not sure about jesus yet...i think we can agree that a loving family and home is preferable to an orphanage).

here are 3 things you can be a part of:

1. PRAY. for the creightons, for natasha, ura (pronounced yuri) and sophia.  for the paperwork, the hearts, the communities. PRAY. you can learn more about the specific needs of everyone and updates on the creighton's adoption blog and their twitter account.

2. make a donation right now! towards the out-of-pocket-costs of the adoption (over $40,000!). no limits, no strings, and 97.1% of the donation goes to the adoption (the other 2.9% goes to paypal).

3. come out and meet the family at a special fundraiser concert that jesse is leading! it is this saturday and you can donate and buy shirts that evening.

4. buy an adoption t-shirt!  SOLD OUT! you guys, i designed these (braggy, yes) and for only the second time in my life didnt use microsoft word as my design platform. for such an idiot, i think they're kind of spiffy sweet.

the design is the word LOVE superimposed over a map of the Ukraine with its flag colors. there is also a tiny heart over the city where the kids' orphanage is (Kherson). the back is an acrostic of the word LOVE inside of a bible verse (idea stolen --in love--from this family's adoption shirt).

 modeled by the big sister to be!

the shirts are the softee cotton blend type that are all the rage (NOT the ultra thick beefy tees) and are a beautiful charcoal grey. 

i know internet stuff can be sketchy...so let me say loud and clear that i put my name, my blog and my own integrity behind the legitimacy of this adoption, this family and this fundraiser.

i have given to adoption fund raisers in the past through weird bloggy friend-of-friend connections, to strangers or even just to be entered in a giveaway. no matter how "random" the family was when i first learned of them, i still feel connected to these families and those adopted children in a really special way that i never expected-- even years later. 

i hope you will choose to support the creightons and be blessed by a similar connection!

under normal circumstances i would not advocate trusting people in a picture like this. but in this case, i can personally vouch for (and make fun of) them.

feel free to tweet, facebook, pin, share, carrier pigeon or just yell about this adoption/post/funraiser/family. the louder the better.

let's bring the rest of this family HOME!

because we were orphans too when He adopted us.  and because with jesus, happily ever after becomes happier ever after.

any further questions about this process, the shirts, etc. can be directed to me or stephanie (the kids' future big sister, our children's minister, and a BFF of mine)  at putapuredukes (at) gmail (dot) com or stephanieanndavis20 (at) gmail (dot) com.

red, yellow, black, white, LOVE

i feel like i have a special place in my heart for adoption fundraisers ever since, you know. but even if that hadn't happened, i would so be all over doing whatever i can to help this lil' family on their journey to expand their family beyond the atlantic ocean:

these are the dockerys. abby with charlotte (1) and pete with eden (3)

they are a gorgeous (in ways that count and the ones that don't so much) family that is sold out for jesus. they live in el paso and work for the ministry casas por cristo. this incredible organization provides safe and sturdy homes to families living in some pretty deplorable circumstances just over the border in juarez, MX (think houses made of chicken wire and cardboard). they do this by hosting mission teams from all over the world who provide the labor for the houses that are built in just a few days.

i met the papa, pete, about 5 days before i met jesus. i went on one of these trips in 2004. technically i was dragged on it. pete was my team's build leader. he was awesome and hilarious and so fun to be around. every night he would go up on the roof of the church we were staying in and talk on the phone to this girl who was back in GA. i was nosy and asked if that was his giiiiiiiiiirlfriend (in a super annoying 3rd grader teasing voice). he said something along the lines of sort of kind of and that he really wanted her to be and blah blah, he was so totally into her but i don't know if they were offish at that point yet. he showed me some of the letters she had sent and i was blown away by her creativity and artsy-ness. i was like, "she totally likes you if this is what she is mailing."

pete and i kept in touch a bit through good old yahoo chat. about 14 months later pete married that girl from the phonecalls in a big field.

fast forward another year and i decide that i am jealous of a bunch of my friends because they have this friend named natalie who is supposed to be just the cat's pajamas. me and natalie, with no prior interaction, decide to become good friends. it works out very well for me. (and my marriage, and for judah).

well, it turns out that natalie's best friend forever is abby. these two have the kind of friendship that people write books about that are then turned into movies that make all the ladies cry because it's so beautiful. i asked natalie to please make abby like me because everyone who knows her adores her. and then i finally get to meet her at nat's wedding in june of 2008. she is as wonderful as advertised.

abs, nat, k8.

even though i think we've only hung out that one time at the wedding, i feel like i am way tight with abby and her family thanks to natalie, facebook and blogs. so i have been following along gleefully for a while now as this great couple raise their firstborn, eden, to when they became a family of 4 last summer and on and on through their day to day adventures in salt and light. i love the way abby writes and parents and take pictures.

so i started bouncing in my chair when i read recently that the dockerys have started the process of international adoption. they are adopting from ethopia. i can't tell you how great i think this family is going to be at opening their hearts and home to a new family member from around the globe.

it was on a hot day, that wedding was (our bridesmaids dresses are dry clean only and mine is still waiting to go to the cleaners, over 2 years later. i sweat so much that day that i am kind of afraid to see what kind of ecosystem my pretty dress has become since then while balled up in the 'to be dry cleaned' bag)

so why i am telling you all this?

well, adoption takes love and grace #1

#2 adoption requirement is probably time. there is a lot of paperwork to be done, laws to follow, communiques between governments and such and so therefore there is no overnight delivery option for these sweet children and their new families. so we pray about these 2 things for the dockerys.

but #3 is something we can actually physically help with right now. because adoption takes money. i don't know how much, but it's a lot. to raise money for their adoption fund, the dockerys have put their creative skills to great use and made t-shirts to sell. these are ultra cool and come in grown up and kids sizes. they are selling them now through their blog. the travel expenses alone for the two required trips the dockerys will take to meet and then bring home their new child will run about $8000, so we can totally take a huge chunk out of that and get a cool t-shirt too that spreads the word and reminds us to pray for them!

if any of the following topics: adoption, the dockerys, ethiopia, orphans, love, africa, jesus, is something that moves you or inspires you, would you puh-lease consider buying some t-shirts from them to help build this family and give an orphan two wonderful parents? if you don't even want the shirt but just want to give straight up, there is also an option for that on their blog as well.

the kids' version...adorable miss charlie sold separately

and since they just can't stop giving...today through saturday the dockerys are doing a giveaway for one of these awesome shirts at their blog. so leave a comment, become a follower of their blog/journey and tell your friends about it and you could win a shirt for free!

if you do nothing else, please at least send up a prayer for the whole dockery family (members living in their home already and those still waiting to come home) as they follow jesus in this awesome adventure.