you have GOT to be kidding me

so the little biter only comes to judah's school 2 days a week. she was there last friday (clearly) and i assume that her other day is wednesday since she bit him AGAIN this week. you will notice the tone of this post is a wee-bit less understanding than the first time around. i want to give grace, but i'm having a hard time. this time i'm frustrated with the teachers for not preventing this...freaking renesme is 2 for 2 in her last two days at school.

and this is on my son, DAMMIT! and this time she broke the skin big time.

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master dukes, please show the court the extent of the injuries that the defendant inflicted upon you in her cold-blooded, premeditated, sociopathic rampage (over reaction):

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look at that face. he's indignant! at first i was like, how did she get such a tiny area of his hand in between her teeth?
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oh, that's how. she had my son's entire pinkie in her vile mouth!
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aaaaaaaand, cue murderous rage, take two. frustrated doesn't even really begin to cover it. apparently there was a new teacher in there who didn't know about the existing situation and let them get close (please note my stony silence after that sentence). why this toddling piranha hates judah so much is anyone's guess since she doesn't bite any other kid EVER.

now they tell us that she will never be allowed to be around judah again and that one more bite and she's gone. i obviously want her gone TODAY and don't want my son to be the recipient of the 3rd bite in a week. she is in class with him today and so help me if he gets bit i am gonna regulate on...well, on someone.

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that. looks. HORRIBLE. we are disinfecting it often since this little female puppy is clearly rabid
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ok i am shutting up about this subject before i get really worked up. here are some folks who do NOT bite judah:

this is jesse's little sister elena. she is 24 and has down syndrome. she is the sweetest, funnest, coolest kid EVAH! we adore her

i hang out with her every monday to provide respite care for the dukes. i often take her to the grocery store since monday is grocery day, but it's not a super-fun time because she either gets bored or points to everything on the shelves and says "dat mah fav-rit." its great practice for when my kids inevitably want me to buy everything there. so this time i had a strategy to make it fun for both of us. we got the big racecar cart and she sat in the bin. we went to the magazine aisle first and got about 5 of her favorites (brides, country living, motorcycles [dat mah fav-rit], etc) and then she camped out in the front while i piled groceries in the seat section where the little kids would sit.

the craziest thing was that i was kind of afraid that someone would mistake her for a misbehaving adult and get us in trouble before i could explain. so i'm over by the deli shopping for hummus (yummus!) and this worker comes running up behind us saying, "excuse me ma'am!" i was like, oh great, here we go. then she says, "do you think she would like a chicken tender?" i almost DIED.

chicken fingers are one of elena's great loves in life so the fact that we didn't get in trouble AND she chased us down to give us what she couldn't possibly have known was elena's favorite food was AH-MAZING. she also told us we could go to the bakery and get her a cookie! by the time we rolled into frozen foods elena had kicked back in the cart with her feet propped up and out of the front and her jacket behind her head, reading magazines and enjoying her cookie. that is some serious VIP grocery store treatment. we had also discussed the merits of various wedding gowns, racing motorcycles and living room decor themes. it was AWESOME!

judah's aunt elena is so good with him and has certainly never bitten him. ahem, just so we're clear.

that brings me to our next friend who doesn't bite. if anyone could be expected to maybe lash out against judah with a little dental force, it's our cat, danger. judah is obsessed with him (he couldn't care less about scout, the other cat who jesse and i can't stand and who actually bit elena once). meals come to a stop when danger-pants saunters by (hence the foodface above). danger is quite feisty with me and jesse but he is ridiculously gentle with judah despite the whisker-tugging, flank-slamming, ear-ripping treatment that judah gives him. plus the occasional jugular/abdominal pin-down:

gooooooood kitty